You’re Fucked
Defined:
screwed, completely hosed, all good in your life has ceased.
In a sentence:
“You’re fucked if you lose your job in this economy.”
“Flying Southwest Airlines during the winter, oh, you’re totally fucked.”
Usage
Whenever You’re Fucked enters the chat, you are probably not in good territory. This is one of those variations of fuck that carries strong negative connotations. The phrase can simply be someone’s opinion of a situation, and opinions are frequently incorrect. It can also be an overreaction.
You could be unconcerned when you hear it because, while things may look bad on the outside, you’ve prepared yourself in advance to navigate what could *potentially* be trouble.
Then, there’s times when you really are completely and utterly screwed. Like when life throws you a massive curve ball, and seemingly forgets to stop throwing. It’s a great expression when trouble does find someone and sticks. You’re Fucked is a short and sweet way to describe a lot of personal chaos.
I don’t use this variation very much. It comes across as too negative. Maybe there’s a small kernel of optimism that still lives within me. I’m a big believer in the power of underdog resiliency. If I do use it, it’s almost guaranteed to be directed at a political figure. And they definitely deserve the harshness.
In Popular Culture
Hands down, my favorite use of You’re Fucked comes from the classic holiday film Planes, Trains and Automobiles. John Candy and Steve Martin are the perfect holiday travel odd couple in this everything-goes-wrong comedy. The entire plot, part of John Hughes’ golden reign, is non-stop laughs.
But Edie McClurg, who plays the airport car rental agent, is absolutely fucking brilliant in her short time on camera. She nails the character with precision deadpan comedic delivery. Anyone who’s ever worked in customer service can relate to her character.
If she looks familiar, there’s a good reason why. McClurg was in a ton of 80s and 90s films, including cult favorites like Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Natural Born Killers, Elvira: Mistress of the Dark, and the sequels to Cheech and Chong’s stoner staple, Up in Smoke. I bet she’s a hoot in real life.
If you’ve never seen this movie, I guarantee you will laugh your fucking ass off. Great one to watch at the end of the holiday season to decompress. Especially if you need a dose of healing, laughter medicine.
Watch Planes, Trains and Automobiles streaming on Paramount+ and premium subscriptions to YouTube, Roku, and Amazon Prime.
Writer’s note: Have a safe New Years, and don’t do anything that would make someone tell you, “You’re Fucked.” Cheers to the end of this fucking year. We made it.